I asked my mom for some sleeping medicine. She gave me some and I was hoping to instantly fall asleep before my thoughts kicked in...but it was hopeless. The thoughts came back fool force. I feel like I have another voice feeling me these negative stuff. Instead of sleeping I'm crying now because all I can think about is my death. How my life is worth nothing. How everything I did to this point is absolutely valueless. How easily expendable I can be...and although I hate the fact that many will cry, I will soon be forgotten like when I was living. And I think that makes me sad the most.
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