Whisper

I found this app called Whisper and I really like it because you can post your secrets anonymously. Of course, there's peeps who are looking for hookups but there are also a majority of those who have secrets to tell. And so I made an account that is surprisingly not my original username and I started posting stuff that I'm just to afraid to mention in regular sites like these. For some reason, I have a hard time admitting them to myself. And for some reason admitting it on that app has a much better satisfaction...

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It gets better over time..

I've been pretty okay now a days... maybe not all that great but for now its good.. anyways i erased some posts about the person i like... why? well because i want to move on. I dont mean i want to forget about her, she's still my friend and will always be but what i want is not to feel 'struck' everyday...we both dont deserve it the pain, nothing will change between us and its okay. I chosed it like that and so did she. So i dont wanna think about it so i took some posts off...my feeling are buried deep within again and i dont plan in resurffing them any time soon.. because for now i havent sufered for the 'what if's' and i've been enjoying the few friends i have during school. Im okay.....

So much easier

School is coming and im still not feeling good... i've been feeling really depressed now a days.. i sometimes consider taking these strong depression pills my mom has.. she doesnt take it sometimes so yeah im not sure... I did do it once though. I had the pill in my hand and i was literally scared because of the sideeffects... but i just couldnt take the down feeling i had and it was so late... i just wanted it to be over with... so i closed my eyes and swallowed that pill down. Sure i was still freaking out but i did it and i went to bed and closed my eyes waiting it to kick in. To not feel like shit anymore... i felt weird for a bit but i think it worked..soon i was able to calm down and have a better night sleep...so now i WANT to take them. I wish i had money to get my own...